What Is In My Heart - Why I Do What I Do
by Jeremiah Ginsberg
May 16, 2013
"What must Your pain at the loss of Your Jewish children be like for You?"
|In 1972, when I was practicing law in my own law-practice, I was lifted in
vision into heaven. I found myself seated on the lap of the Father who told me
that I would build for Him "a new house of worship." His massive chest and gentle beauty
were overwhelming, and I immediately realized that He was
my true Father and I felt deep and unending love for Him.
He then introduced me to His only-begotten Son, Yeshua, who looked exactly like Him, only eons younger-looking and with reddish-brown hair. His features were exquisitely chiseled and His eyes kind and wise. I knew that I needed to introduce Him one day to my Jewish people.
I had been writing music since the age of four. My songs had been recorded by major stars and I had been a theater writer and theatrical attorney. But from the moment I met the Master, I determined to write a musical to introduce my new-found lovely Jewish Savior to His Jewish family in a Jewish way.
Like most Jewish people, I had always assumed that He was a blond-haired, blue-eyed Catholic. But I was wrong! When I discovered Him as my Jewish Messiah and Savior, I whole-heartedly gave my life to Him. Some time later in another heavenly vision, He put His arm through mine and walked across the clouds with me and told me that I would be His "divine lawyer," representing His kingdom. He took me out of my law practice permanently. Little did I know that over the years I was to become a radio personality in the New York City Metropolitan area and a pioneering playwright, composer, lyricist, producer of Bible musicals Off-Broadway and in L.A. and a well seasoned world traveling-minister of the Gospel.
After I had accepted Jesus as my Messiah, my family abandoned me leaving me alone and forlorn. My then-wife called me a Jewish lawyer Jesus freak. She was violently opposed to my new-found faith, saying I was no longer the Jewish lawyer she had married, and she fled from our home in New Canaan, Connecticut, taking my beloved little daughter of that marriage and her two daughters from a prior marriage, whom I also loved very much. They left me because of my faith in Yeshua the Jewish Messiah.
My law practice in New Canaan, CT became a virtual vale of tears. I despised my life and the emptiness that surrounded me, each day worse than the one before it. Never had I known such grief, even when my beloved Grandfather died many years before. My ex-wife became cruel and after awhile denied me the right to see my children and I did not fight her not wanting to bring more pain into their young lives.
One day when she allowed my beloved little child to spend a day with me at my apartment in New Canaan, we kneeled down and I prayed with her. As we prayed, she said to me, "Daddy, I see God." "Tell me, honey, what does He look like?" "He has a giant white beard," she said. My heart was singing because I knew that God was revealing Himself to my little 4-year old darling daughter that day.
I prayed with her that God would bless her and walk with her all of her life. As I drove her home that day, the sky turned black and it began to pour with lightning and bursts of thunder. So she would not be frightened, we began to sing one of my songs that she loved, "Blessed Be The Name of the Lord," from the 113th Psalm. We sang it over and over and over again to shield her from her fear at the storm... and it worked. And I prayed for her, "Dear Lord, please make this rain and lightning and thunder go away!" When we finally arrived at her home, it was still pouring, but above the apartment where she was living with her mother and sisters, the clouds had opened and there was a wide swath of blue sky encircling the building; everywhere else it was still raining.
"Daddy," she uttered in absolute amazement, "look at what God has done for us!" And I said, "Thatís because we were singing and praising Him, honey !"
It wasnít long thereafter that her mother turned my daughterís heart against me and Iíve only seen her a couple of times in all these nearly 40 years and she was no longer the little girl who was so loving towards my God. And, during all of those years of missing her I literally had to take authority over the pain in my heart and command it to go.
Then my sweet Wendy came into my life and brought joy and healing, and now on May 29th we are celebrating thirty-one years of a beautiful marriage! But I have had to cut the memory of my daughter loose to the best of my ability to spare myself ongoing misery and sadness.
Why do I tell you this? Because I want you to know why I write my musicals: To bring the beauty of our Jewish Lord to my Jewish people in a wonderful and inspirational way. I have been doing just that with Wendy, my wife and writing partner, since 1982.
And, as I pray, so often I will tell the Lord, "If my pain at the loss of my little daughter was so extreme and unbearable, what must Your pain at the loss of Your Jewish children be like for You? How have You borne it so graciously for so many thousands of years?"
And, it is with this in my mind that I have struggled on through the years doing everything in my human strength to bring His Jewish love-children back to Him! That is my sworn goal and I never will stop until the day that I go to my grave.
If my pain was unbearable with the loss of and being despised wrongfully by my few Jewish children, how crushing must His pain be with a whole nation of Jewish children who despise Him and make a curse word out of His name, children whose names are even inscribed in the palms of His hands, and He is God! And He meekly and bravely bears it in His heart, but I know How painful it must be because I have tasted of it if only in a small measure. If my longing almost brought me to my grave, what must His be like?
And now you can understand that I write not with the motive of making money or merely entertaining, but of gently feeding His beloved Jewish lambs and leading them to Him by showing them who He really is and the depths of His love for them, His children.
Our musicals are for this reason infused by Him with the spark of His Heavenly beauty and majestic, supernatural, agape-filled loving-kindness, drawing His people to His pure, noble and long-suffering bosom that I rested against so many years ago in Heaven. And because of this, we have been able to lead many Jewish and Gentile people to Him and will continue to do so at this time with your financial help.
This has been a sacrificial ministry over all of these years of the painful battles with the devil and suffering the abuse that has come our way because of our stand of faith for Him. Although we may have become well known for our musicals, we have never made any profit for ourselves. As a matter of fact, we have been left with significant debts from time to time and have given the major portion of our income over the years to keep on with the work.
Often we are persecuted by the very people whom we love and sacrifice for, that they may learn the truth of their own loving Father in Heaven who loves with much greater love than I loved my little girl.
So that we can continue with this great commission, we ask you to join us in this quest to bring comfort to the Lord and to sooth His great sadness at the loss of the "apple of His eye," His firstborn, and help us to hasten the day when they will come to Him as nation, that He may be joyous with them at His side!
Most people do not understand my great love for the Master and the reason for my driving dedication to finish the work even in the face of great persecution. There have been few who have stood with us in comparison to the millions who have supported the churches, but we continue to search to find those who will stand in the gap with us as we hasten to bring the truth of Yeshua the Jewish Messiah to Zion, His beloved!
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